“You all are like my children,” my manager said to me.

I just stared at him. I was offended on so many levels. I was NOT his child in any sense of the word. However, as this was my first professional job, I didn’t say anything in response though I could feel my body constricting in anger. He then went on to elaborate just why he thought his direct reports were like his children: We didn’t always agree, some team members get upset with other team members. And so on.

If what he really meant to say is we are all human beings that at times disagree with a direction or a decision, or that we can be offended by what we think are inappropriate remarks, then yes, we are all like children. And sometimes, that’s ok.

The most amazing, and appalling, piece of this point of view is that my manager clearly thought he was the only reasonable adult person at work. Wow. Pretty arrogant – and definitely wrong.

All of us, including those managers who think their employees are their children, have experienced frustration, disagreements, and yes, squabbling, at work. It’s called being human! Instead of responding by thinking people are acting like children, a good manager assesses the situation and takes appropriate action. He does not treat his employees like children.

Childish behavior at work is usually encouraged by the manager.

 

If you think you are the only adult at work, then you must be doing something wrong. If you treat people like your children, you will get childish behavior from some and others will leave your organization. This is why the real solution is to raise the bar on behavior.

I treat those that work for me like I want to be treated: as an adult. I find it is more respectful and rarely does behavior degenerate into childish behavior. Especially since they know I expect professional, respectful behavior.